C’est là que commence la folie

I’m on Day 73 of my Duolingo streak, and into the second week of my video game boycott.  The boycott isn’t anything political:  I was just parked in a low mental activity rabbit hole1, and I finally had enough sleep to realize that.

With a few exceptions this past month, I have gotten myself moving toward bed around ten at night, and asleep by eleven.  I know it will be a while before I am completely crawled out from under the chronic sleep deprivation, and I keep reminding myself of that, especially when I notice that in general, I’m doing better.  Yes, really.  I am running just a single load of laundry every day. On very good days, it gets put away semi-immediately. It is in no immediate danger of becoming another low mental activity rabbit hole.

I even have “Begin Blog Post” (which was Monday, August 5th) and “Publish Blog Post” (booked for Monday, August 12th) tasks blocked into my planner, just like I had last month.  We’ll see if I get sick of working on this post before the 12th and chuck it over the fence ahead of schedule like I did last month2.

…and obviously, I did not.  It is five minutes until ten on Monday, August 12th, and here I am not really knowing how to finish this blog post other than to say yeah, I can really notice it now when I don’t get into bed by ten, and setting my alarm clock for an hour later to try to compensate for the lack of sleep only makes it worse because I start off the morning feeling like I’m behind and I’m running to catch up all day.

Yeah, I did that last night.  @bhoneydew was in the living room watching the first episode of Another Life when I was heading to bed last night, and I got drawn into the story-based entertainment black hole before I could escape.  I won’t say that I should know better, because I already do know better.

I also am better.  Despite getting up an hour later than usual, I still managed to do everything I had planned to do today — including this blog post.  Boom.


1This sounds better than “place Shai goes to hide”, I think.
2Because it takes a surprising amount of effort for me these days to write anything (work related, non-work related, school related, grocery lists) that doesn’t read like I threw it together on my cell phone while parked in a waiting room.  Our son currently has physical therapy for his ankle twice a week, and I’ve hit the beginning of my fall checkups.

Disconnect and Recharge

I had an accidental vacation this weekend. Since the Monster’s cast is now off, he can swim again, so we drove down to the in-laws’ place on the 4th.

For the first time ever, I forgot to pack the charging cord for my laptop. The day of work I had planned for Friday, and the weekend of unplanned work I had anticipated (yes, really) suddenly turned into except-for-what-you-can-handle-via-cell-you-can-only-work-a-half-day-unless-you-spend-the-rest-of-the-day-driving-home.

I worked until the laptop ran out of juice. I did not drive home. I also canceled a meeting instead of trying to handle it via cell.

I admit I spent more time this weekend than I should have twitching instead of relaxing.  See, last summer when I had scheduled vacation, I wound up spending the first day of it on a marathon conference call and most of the first night doing research and sending emails related to that conference call.  On day two, after I had gotten dragged back into a call as soon as I had climbed into a swimming pool, I gave up and went home just as soon as I could hang up the phone and get out of the water.

Yes, I once did a conference call while standing in a swimming pool. It’s not one of my happiest moments, and certainly not one of my brightest, even if the phone did survive.

I got into the pool this weekend. Let me rephrase that.  I made myself get into the pool this weekend, despite feeling like if I tried to have fun, something would interrupt it.

It did help that I accidentally left my phone plugged into the charger inside my in-laws’ house, and maybe-not-as-accidentally let it have a vacation for the rest of the weekend, while I finished the book I started back in, uhm, March, and started another. I did not make any more dishcloths (though I have made a few more since I last mentioned them), but I did continue with my Duolingo refresher. I’m now on Day 39.

Day 39. I can’t believe it either.

What’s next?  Writing more frequent blog posts? Writing again in general?  Maybe just more dishcloths? Tous ces optimisme me donne le vertige.

Slippage

Writing objectives is not simply a process of sitting,
Pen in involvement,
Waiting in the interest of guidance
At the word-for-word on one occasion
The laboratory spikes and analyzes
If you have in the offing vital data
That is not addressed by the questions
There is a deductive way

– #spamadvice aggregated from the last two weeks

A healthful gym should be a resource where you stool punch your wounds.

-#spam comment that I should put on a workout shirt

It is February, and it is almost over, blessedly over.

For a while, years now, there has been too much in February, good and bad and too often cooped up indoors while the weather is trying to make up its mind if it is finally winter or if it is time for spring.

Things either finally get organized or they start to slip. This year, it was slip.  I didn’t post blog entries. I stopped doing my Duolingo refresher. I stopped studying every night and started cramming schoolwork in on weekends. I stopped reading every day (to be fair, I read a fair bit in January).  I took off my FitBit at some point during the last week of January, and I haven’t put it back on yet, except for the one time — maybe twice — I made it to the gym.

However, I did bake bread each week.  We cooked at home almost every night. I succeeded in cleaning out the coat closet that has been mocking me for probably four years, and maybe six.  Did my taxes. Got in a plumber to deal with the master bath toilet and downstairs sink, both of which decided to go out in a mutual pact of drippy rage, and take part of the hot water heater with them, because … it’s February?

It’s February.  Soon it will be it was February.

It will get better.

I started another dishcloth yesterday morning.

 

Two Dishcloths Later…

Je crois que mon titre serait “deux torchons plus tard” en français.  I think.  I restarted my Duolingo French refresher as one of my not-really-a-resolution-that-just-so-happened-to-start-around-the-New-Year-nothing-to-see-here-Universe things.  Not that I had a practical reason to restart my Duolingo French refresher, beyond seeing it as a bit of psychic clutter that might finally go away if I finish it, and it’d probably be healthier to finish it than, oh, say, for a completely random example, the Dragonborn expansion of Skyrim.1

Probably.

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Interstitial Sorting

Hey there, you have done a great job.
-Random Spammer #1

(Evidence is lacking of poor traits or conflicts
So the comparison of benefits and harms cannot be determined.)

-Random Spammer #2

I like how this sounds. Have you considered changing?
-Random Spammer #3

Hi. Wow, yeah, it has been a while. Remember when I used to post multiple times a week, or once a week, or once a month? Yeah, me neither.

There’s been … you know, stuff going on. I’m still doing work and school and gym wise what I was doing back in September — and back in June, if we’re counting from my last “real” blog post.  There have been good weeks and bad weeks and gritted teeth days, but none of them have involved sacrifice of anything other than the occasional gym visit or good night’s sleep or entire weekend or part of a vacation.

I am feeling better, but it’s best not to ask how I spent my summer vacation.

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Preoccupation and Progress

Having all of the alternatives
And a sense of joyful preoccupation,
This coming year will be
A mischief-maker of strategies
To salvage you to improved discern.

-12.29.2017, #SpamFortuneCookie, which doesn’t sound good, and probably isn’t.

Happy Almost New Year. I settled on FocusWriter. It only took me a week of evaluating the pros and cons. This is progress.

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Reflex Action

Suppose that each time you succeed,
you quit all feelings that resemble interest,
walk away with little to show for your joy
and distrust of that remainder.

-12.22.2017, the latest #spampoetry.

Why, yes, I did spend the better part of my non-working day evaluating WriteMonkey, FocusWriter and the latest iteration of Scrivener versus not investing/re-investing in any of them and sticking with random scrawled notes on Post-Its translated into WordPad (though, these days, it’ll more likely be Notepad++ with word wrap turned on), then crammed into Microsoft Word.1

I came to no conclusion beyond that I shouldn’t have bought ice cream yesterday, because there is now ice cream in my house, which means I can stop this spinning and have some ice cream.

Though, it is nearly 11:30, and I have a workout scheduled tomorrow…

Yeah, I’ll skip the ice cream in favor of drinking a glass of water and going to bed.


1I signed up for some creative accountability in the New Year. Or accounting of my creativity, that is, stuff WithMyOwnNameOnItAndCrapWasThisAGoodIdea?